L’s World

{March 2, 2008}   Fight


It’s a miracle. I woke up early today. I already finished my errands and is about to eat – if I decide I want to eat with my boyfriend. He cooked breakfast/lunch for us.After waking up at 8:30 A.M., we went to Valero and bought money order to be sent as payment for our purchase in California. We proceeded to the post office at Panther Creek. We were confused on how to go about sending a priority mail via USPS. We are used to sending parcels via private companies like Fedex and UPS. They just pick up the mail or we bring them in their branch and voila, they do everything for you. As for the USPS, we had to use the Automated Postage Machine, paid by credit card, place the envelope inside the priority mail envelope and drop it in the meter machine. I forgot to bring a pen so we ended up borrowing an old man’s pen. Our errands did not stop there. We went to Walmart and bought some veggies because Ate Mae is cooking nilaga for dinner. We also bought some seedless green grapes and strawberries – I just hope they’re sweet. When we were in the car heading back home, I asked my bf if he loves me. I always do that. He said “not right now while I’m driving.” I did not like how that sounded. So I said, “oh, so you have a switch for loving me.” He said “not like that. I’m not like you who loves me 24/7. I can’t do that. I’m not showy.”im
I got angry. I do not expect him to give me kisses and hugd 24/7. I do not require him to be always by my side 24/7. I believe that if you love someone you will love him/her 24/7. It will never disappear. It is always in your heart. There is no switch for love. You can’t love and then not love all in one day.

When we got home, I told him I’m not eating. Then here I am writing my heartache away.

I don’t care if I’m hungry and my stomach’s acids are surging. I am really angry and this is my way of showing him I’m pissed – hunger strike.

Fights are inevitable but it would be great and better if there are no fights. I don’t like fights. It sucks out the life in me. I feel so drained and empty whenever we fight.

I hate him right now. So, there goes my switch!


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